Primary (5–11)
The gap shouldn't grow while they wait for a plan.
📖 How to tell your child's story at this age
By now, you've been watching for years. You know when they're struggling and when they're coping. You know what works at home that school never seems to try. That knowledge IS evidence.
The graduated response — assess, plan, do, review
Assess
The school identifies the need. Baseline is recorded. This is not 'we think they're behind' — it's a measured starting point.
If the school can't tell you their reading age or their maths level, they haven't assessed.
Plan
The school writes down what support they'll provide. Who, what, how often, for how long. This is the provision map.
If the plan says 'extra support' without saying what kind, who does it, or how often — it's not a plan.
Do
The provision is delivered. The TA does the intervention. The resources are provided. The adaptations are made.
If the TA was off sick for 3 weeks and nobody covered the intervention — it wasn't delivered. Record it.
Review
The school checks progress. Did the provision work? At what rate? What needs to change?
If the review says 'making progress' without a number — ask for the number. Progress is measurable or it's a feeling.
School refusal — it's 'can't,' not 'won't'
When a child refuses school, it's almost never about defiance. It's about a system that doesn't fit them. Anxiety, sensory overwhelm, undiagnosed needs, bullying, exhaustion. The question isn't "why won't they go?" — it's "what is school doing to them?"
The school must:
Make reasonable adjustments. Offer a reduced timetable if needed. Refer to educational psychology. Not penalise the family for non-attendance related to SEN.
The LA must:
Arrange suitable education from day 1 of absence if the child can't attend due to health/SEN (s.19 duty). Not wait until the child has been out for 15 days.
You can:
Request an EHC needs assessment. Keep a record of every day your child couldn't attend and why. Ask the GP to write a letter linking absence to SEN/anxiety.